Wednesday, January 14, 2009

2009 Already has me down....how about you?

Ive been in a less than happy mood lately. Ive spent the last few months trying to improve myself yet im finding myself deeper and deeper into sadness. I quit smoking on January 1st and that has not helped my emotional stability. But the one thing that is truly taken a toll on my mood is the fact that I can not be with the one i love. Being in a bi national same sex relationship has obstacles that has taken over me. The land of the free, due to its discrimination toward same sex couples, forbids me to be with her legally. I finally have someone who makes all my sadness disappear and the country i was born in, THE USA, has shut me out from my right of happiness. With everything that is going on in the world, unemployment, debt, wars, and violence, im overwhelmed with anger. There is nothing or i should say no one able to take away the hurt that my heart feels everyday except her. Sometimes you just want to come home and be close to that special someone. Its difficult for me to put into words exactly how i feel right now. My life feels like it is on hold and that someone else ( Washington) is granted the right to dictate my future. I feel helpless though i know im not. I want to stand up against those who deny me my happiness. I want to run through the streets demanding equality.